Arsenal - Not Standing Quite So Tall!

[Bernard's briefs]

Hi All

Suffering Arsenal withdrawals, it didn't take me long to make my mind up
when I received an e-mail this afternoon which said that young Swiss
defender Phillipe Senderos would finally make a competitive appearance
following his pre-season injury, in the reserves against Wimbledon this
evening.

As a result I dashed out the house like a lunatic, trying to make the 7pm
kick-off at Underhill. Naturally I arrived late when as it turned out, I
would have been better off arriving early and leaving at half-time like my
pal. She left with quite a good impression, while I was left trying to
forget something of a nightmare second half.

While it was great to finally see the Senderos playing in an Arsenal
shirt, the way things worked out, I can't really offer much of an appraisal
of his ability. I assume he was taken off at the break merely as a
precaution, to get him back to full fitness gently but it was a great pity
because he had very little actual defending to do in the first half and he
would have received a much stiffer test if he'd stayed on for the second
period.

It wasn't a brilliant first-half but we were hardly troubled by Wimbledon
and played some very attractive football going forward, with neat intuitive
passing moves between Bradley and Cesc and some good runs down the right
flank by Hoyte (who I understand was also quite impressive in his appearance
for England U20s on Friday night). Perhaps the most promising performance
was that of young Ryan Smith, which as an Islington born lad, was very
pleasing. However it would seem that once again (as they've done with other
players) the club are attempting to find out if the lad can do an Henry, as
in turning him from a winger into a striker.

He's very quick, with two good feet, but as with his colleagues he is always
likely to suffer in this position from the fact that he lacks a goal
poachers instincts. Smith was also troubling the Dons down the right flank
and I think (??) it was his cross which resulted in the goal, as
Papadoupulos rose to head home a cross with a powerful header

I believe the Arsenal web site said that we have Papadoupulos on loan from
his Czech side (which I think is his nationality despite his obvious Greek
origins - and it was lovely to see Tavlaridis as one of the first to run
over and congratulate him). As I turned to my mate and said that it was
great to see someone in an Arsenal shirt who finally looks happy heading a
ball (an ability I don't think we've seen since the departure of Johnny
Hartson), she commented "Ah perhaps a 'plan B' at last"

I have also heard some tell how they think Senderos is definite captain
material and this was evident in the way he made a point of having a brief
one-to-one, as he put his arm around the goal scorer.

I wish I could recall more details of the opening half, especially in the
light of what transpired. We seemed to lose all air of
authority from the moment the second-half started, with Senderos having been
replaced by Alex Bailey and although he didn't see much of the ball at all
up front, the diminutive Adam Birchall was far from convincining as Papadops
replacement.

Perhaps it was just that the Dons had been given a decent half-time talk, as
I imagine the vast majority of them were quite a lot older than the
Arsenal's extremely young side and as a result a fair bit more powerfully
built. If they had been showing us too much respect early on, it all went
out the window after the break, as they went for the Arsenal's throat with a
real vengeance, cutting through our defence virtually at will.

The Dons had the ball in the back of the net within a couple of minutes of
the restart and although this was ruled offside, it didn't make much
difference because they followed this up with incisive moves which soon
reversed the scoreline and it wasn't long before the Arsenal were 1-4 down,
with the limited number of Gooners who had bothered to turn out on this
miserable, damp evening all sounding somewhat disgruntled.

The Dons strikers Wayne Gray and Ben Harding took their goals very well,
giving Stack little chance of saving them and their pace left our defence
trailing in their wake

As a footnote, there were a fair few Dons supporters in the stand, none of
whom sounded as though they'd travelled from Milton Keynes :-)

Hopefully the above will make up for the lack of Arsenal content in the
following. With so little Arsenal news it was mostly written with the
Examiner's Irish readers in mind and the English amongst you will have to
forgive my focus on the Green Army's adversities.

Meanwhile it has also occurred to me that I neglected to mail out last
week's missive to all of you, so with another quiet week on the Arsenal
front, at least you have two for the price of one :-)

Peace & Love
Bernard

[Bernard's briefs]

Not Standing Quite So Tall!

After spending my formative years at a school where association football
was positively frowned upon and worse still, being forced to endure a
certain amount of egg chasing after lessons on some Saturday afternoons when
I wasn¹t able to skive off to Highbury, I suppose I retain a subliminal
aversion to the Philistine sport. Nevertheless I have to admit that I
thoroughly enjoyed the Antipodean derby on Saturday morning.

I¹m no aficionado but I¹ve never watched in its entirety a more
engrossing encounter of this roughhouse game. At least I didn¹t feel
cheated out of a lie-in, like I did last weekend after forsaking my bed for
the Boys In Green¹s sorry World Cup swansong. Yet I suppose they didn¹t have
the sort of help the English had, with the heavens opening to hinder the
Gauls' passing game on Sunday.

It wasn¹t just Ireland¹s exit from the Rugby World Cup which I found
myself regretting this past weekend. There were plenty Oif onlys¹ watching
the admirable efforts of Wales and Scotland against Russia and Holland in
the footie. The result in Glasgow was remarkable from the point of view that
Holland have household names playing in virtually every position, while
there is nary a well-known player in the entire Scottish squad. There is a
good chance that the Dutch will overcome the single goal deficit in the
Amsterdam Arena. Yet as it stands at the moment, the atmosphere on the
Algarve next summer will be somewhat more sterile if both genial armies of
Orange and Green are absent (and the Portuguese are undoubtedly counting
down the days to the arrival of the cantankerous English contingent!). If
Ireland¹s non-participation is painful now, we¹ll be positively pulling our
hair out come the summer, when there will be no escaping the blanket
coverage of Portuguese jamboree.

There was wall-to-wall live sport for us addicts over the course of the
weekend. If watching both forms of footie wasn¹t enough to send me
goggle-eyed, I sat through several hours of glorious skills performed on the
green baize. Perhaps this was comforting because the snooker surface was the
closest thing to the perfect pitch at Highbury. Since what I really miss
during a Gunners free fortnight is some proper partisan participation.

Sure I was up for Wales and Scotland (especially as underdogs) but I
wouldn¹t have been exactly devastated if either had suffered defeat and I
certainly wasn¹t going to get my knickers in a twist over an England v
Denmark friendly. In fact with only Arsenal¹s Ashley Cole involved and with
the mother-out-of-law over from Dublin, I wish I¹d watched Rooney and co. in
one of the round-the clock replays and gone out to Sunday lunch instead.

The one game which might have got me salivating was France v Germany but
coverage of this was nowhere to be found on my multitude of satellite
channels. An evening with Thierry Henry these days is almost guaranteed
first-class entertainment for us football lovers and I understand he didn¹t
disappoint with his redoubtable contribution to all three goals against the
Gerries. If there¹s a rare dearth of disparaging remarks about my favourite
nation, my diplomacy might well be related to the fact that I've just read
that the latest hopes for financing Ashburton Grove rest on a group of
German investors.

Come Sunday I was so fed up with the ersatz substitute of International
football that I couldn¹t concentrate on 90 minutes of Brazil v Peru.
Gilberto provided the Arsenal connection but recently his football has been
sufficiently uninspiring that many Gooners are convinced he is more Millwall
than Copacabana.

Deprived of my beloved Arsenal for ten days now, I¹m getting pretty
depressed. I don¹t want to turn on my TV and watch some Beckham lookalike
duping fawning Orientals with a couple of keepy-uppies, leeching on
football¹s seemingly boundless bandwagon. And with bombs going off in
Turkey, it is neither appropriate, nor do I particularly want to see
Goldenballs albeit handsome face staring up from both front and back covers
of the tabloid press. We appear to be living in a society where the media
are obsessed with the periphery, when all I want is my regular fix of real
footie to distract me from the madness which surrounds us.

Obviously I understand the economics of it all. The Beckhams have
replaced Lady Di since her tragic demise, as the best sellers of newsprint
on this star struck planet of ours and scandal and salacious gossip are the
stock in trade of the tabloids. Yet if frustrates the hell out of me that
this fervour for fruity headlines is now the fuel which drives our
³beautiful game² in detrimental directions.

I doubt the FA would have raised an eyebrow about Alan Smith¹s innocuous
bottle throwing incident if they didn¹t fear the wrath of the red-tops and
the rumpus resulting from the selection of a prospective felon (it didn¹t
prevent the Yanks putting one in the White House!). Nor might I add, would
the Arsenal be facing such a severe rash of suspensions if it weren¹t for
the entire media¹s maniacal reaction to the Van Nistleroy inspired, immature
posturing after our match against Man U.

Perhaps Smith¹s bad boy karma is to blame, but I can¹t help but feel
sorry for the cruel twist of fate which befell the young lad. To get picked
from a pitifully poor Leeds side is a feat in itself. But on the basis that
the rash of injuries which resulted in his inclusion are unlikely to be
repeated in the near future, he must have spent the weekend sitting at home
thinking that the FA have blown his one and only chance to make an
impression prior to Portugal 2004. I bet such career hindering consequences
weren¹t on the minds of those who sent Smith packing!

Meanwhile there was some light hearted relief on Monday with the news
that none if the Irish players were harmed in the armed raid on the
Portmarnock Hotel because they were all able to hide behind Damien Duff¹s
wallet! One person who will be wrapped in cotton wool this week will be
Johnny Wilkinson. With England finally making the final of a World Cup the
media here are trying to rekindle the spirit of O66. Yet you have to look no
further than Highbury for an example of the comparative impacts of the two
sports. You didn¹t have to be a footie fan to know when England scored
against Brazil in Japan because our entire block of flats reverberated to
the resulting hullabaloo. Whereas the tranquility in Highbury Quadrant was
hardly disturbed on Sunday by a single voice saluting the feats of Wilkinson
(and it wasn¹t mine as I didn¹t want to disturb the missus!)..

Speaking of voices the most bizarre aspect to events in Australia has
been the sight of these big butch fellas emotionally singing along to the
falsetto tones of the seemingly castrated troubadours chosen to sing their
national tunes (including Ireland¹s cacophonous clichéd kop-out). I might
have a passing interest in Saturday¹s match in Sydney but in truth it
certainly won¹t delay my departure for Birmingham. I don¹t think I¹ve ever
been so desperate to see a match at St. Andrews and it will be Matthew
Upson¹s defensive failings (hopefully) which will be of far more interest to
me than those of the Wallabies.

[Bernard's briefs]

I guess us Gooners were spoilt for good last season by the gobsmacking
brilliance of so many of our performances. This Arsenal side set such an
incredible standard by which everything else appears so mundane by
comparison. Having raised the bar of our expectations to such seemingly
unobtainable heights, there are many Arsenal fans and plenty in the media
who can¹t appreciate the simple three point pleasures and the stuttering
performances which have seen us grind out a quarter of this season as the
only unbeaten side in the land.

A repeat of the 4-1 thrashing of the Elland Road relegation fodder was
merely a reminder of difference between last season¹s completely devastating
display. Similarly our encounter with our North London neighbours was never
going to live up to the tonking they suffered when they last dared to show
their faces at Highbury as this resulted in Titi Henry tearing them asunder
virtually singlehanded with his goal of the season contender. Nevertheless
there was a certain pleasure to Saturday¹s somewhat fluky success which was
a nostalgic throwback to the OLucky Arsenal¹ of yesteryear.

By contrast a dismal decade since their last success at Highbury has
left THFC fans so demoralized, with their expectations so stunted that for
those who continue to attend this annual meeting, it must be a loyal act of
masochism equivalent to self-flagellation in religious terms. At least going
a goal down within five minutes guaranteed an even more intense atmosphere
on Saturday. You can imagine the Lilywhite euphoria in their corner of
Highbury as Anderton rekindled all their hope for the best part of an hour,
only to see it extinguished by a cruel twist of fate with Freddie
Ljungberg's deflected shot. I almost felt sorry for them as we sadistically
sent them packing to the sound of ³Beat Arsenal! You¹re having a larf!²

It¹s not surprising that Wenger was left blaming fatigue for our
somewhat lacklustre showing. I was left exhausted merely by all the tension
of our midweek Champions League clash. I can¹t possibly imagine the physical
cost of hammering at Dynamo¹s door for almost the entire ninety with our
desperate efforts to keep our European hopes alive leaving them pounding the
length of the pitch as the game became more stretched at the death.

Having both suffered and celebrated over so many unexpected turns of
events before the fat lady sings over the years, I am usually the last to
give up hope in such circumstances. Yet on Wednesday I have to admit that
like the rest of the Highbury faithful, I succumbed to being resigned to our
fate for about the last ten minutes. Usually Wenger¹s gung-ho efforts to
snatch victory from the jaws of defeat by throwing four strikers into the
fray, would have us Gooners out of our seats, screaming our heads off in an
effort to inspire one last gasp blitz before the final whistle with a
passion which might obliterate any thought of the players¹ oxygen deficient
limbs. Whereas on Wednesday a strange hush befell Highbury as though we all
believed our Champions League hopes were already dead and buried. Myself I
was sitting back, slumped in my seat, almost certain that Sod¹s Law was
going to leave us with a trip to Milan which would be hardly worth taking
with nothing but pride to play for.

Still it didn¹t stop me superstitiously grabbing for Róna¹s hand every
time the ball came within shooting distance of either goal. The tension
became so unbearable that by the time Ashley Cole popped up with his 88th
minute header, I was gripping her hand so tight that I nearly broke her
wrist as I levitated out of my seat and punched the air in joyous relief
that we will hopefully be sitting in the San Siro in two weeks time, with
our qualification prospects intact. I thought it most appropriate that it
was the only homegrown player on the pitch (Parlour having been subbed)
whose never-say-die commitment resulted in a sprint out of defence and into
the penalty area to steal the winner.

Although it would appear that Inter have stopped their Serie A rot, I
have always fancied our chances to exploit their weaknesses on the wide
expanses of the Milanese pitch. It is our last group game which is my
greatest concern, as I envisage a similar slog to last week, against a
Locomotiv side who will have undoubtedly learnt from all those who have come
to Highbury and achieved their aim of defying our ability with an obdurate
defence.

However no matter how far we are destined to travel on this season¹s
European adventure, one cannot possibly over estimate the importance of last
week¹s result. Such are the small margins between success and failure in
football that after expending so much effort on Wednesday, I am almost
certain that without that last minute winner, the Arsenal would have
suffered such a blow to their morale that we wouldn¹t have managed to find
the resolve for Saturday¹s comeback and our premature exit from European
competition might have blighted our entire domestic campaign.

Instead of which, we go into another International break with renewed
faith that our Champions League fate rests in our own hands. What¹s more,
we¹ve somehow managed to retain our place atop the pile, whilst remaining
unbeaten in encounters with all our most earnest competitors, without ever
having settled into the sort of stride which this side is most eminently
capable and of late without the crucial driving force of our team captain,
Patrick Vieira. Aside from our two further European encounters, the Arsenal
now face a programme where we don¹t come up against a Oquality¹ team until
our trip to Stamford Bridge on 21st February.

Unlike last season, we certainly won¹t have shot our bolt before the end
of autumn. There have been some slightly encouraging signs of late, like the
sight of Pires appearing in the box in time to tap home on Saturday.
Hopefully we can play our way into some kind of form when it matters, just
in time to tonk the lesser lights of Leicester and Wolves, while our
competitors are taking points off each other. However my greatest fear is
that the opposite might prove true and that unglamorous trips to the
Midlands might not be enough to galvanize this team out of what some
perceive as a tendency to go a goal down as a result of the fatal mistake of
thinking winning is just a matter of turning up.

The quality running throughout the Premiership these days is such that
in almost every opponent there is someone capable of making the most of
momentary complacent lapses. Many suggest it is the results against our
immediate competitors which are most crucial but in my humble opinion it
will be our performance in the coming period which will determine our true
Championship credentials. There is no motivation required for titanic
encounters against Man Utd or Chelsea. Yet with the possibility of our squad
being down to the bare bones, it will be bringing home the bacon on a
miserable afternoon in Bolton or Birmingham which could prove the Gunners¹
greatest burden.