Arsenal - I Can't Believe It's Not Butter

[Bernard's briefs]

Hi folks

I will keep this short as I want to get on and type up Arsene's comments
from the post match press conference at Elland Road. Although it shouldn't
take me too long because he didn't stop for long. For once this wasn't
because he was being hurried along by his over efficient press officer but
because a conference room packed full of the 'cream' of British journalism
couldn't conjure up a question amongst them.

It's only the second press conference I've been to in recent times and I
didn't go to any of them last season but in the past I have been more than
used to the sort of cliche questions that are commonly asked. However I have
to admit to being flabbergasted that in the light of the amount of column
inches they have to fill and with all the controversial events of the past
few weeks, none of the gathered journalists could be bothered to enquire
after Arsene's opinion on anything at all!!

Personally I had plenty of questions in my head that I would have liked to
ask. In the past I have been somewhat timid because I didn't want to upset
anyone there who might have a more pressing enquiry. However on Saturday I
was desperate to open my mouth merely to keep Arsene in his chair as it was
obvious he wasn't going to sit there for long in light of the absolute
silence facing him. I just wish I had made more of an effort previously to
be more au fait with the implications of the punishments handed down by the
FA, as I was desperate to enquire how he intends to deal with them exactly
but I was too afraod of making a fool of myself for fear that I might be
asking him to reveal something that's been in the public domain for the past
few days.

I also would have liked to know if it wouldn't have been a good idea to have
a couple of youngsters on the bench to throw on with Aliadiere at half-time,
with the points being virtually in the bag. After all how often are we going
to be in such a comfortable position, 3-0 up at the break away from home.
What's more, I would have thought that it would be preferable to give them a
run out away from home, where they might be a little more relaxed when the
occasional duff touch doesn't elicit a groan from 30,000 Gooners.

However this wasn't really pertinent when even Aliadiere was only given a 15
minute run-out. So in the end I merely asked if he wasn't tempted to take
Henry off at the break but apparently he didn't think Titi was exerting
himself too much, as I've explained below. I can understand his reasoning in
some respects because Henry is the sort of player who has never perviously
benefited from being on the bench. Such is Henry's enthusiasm that despite
running his socks off in two games a week, I can well imagine him walking in
the park on a Sunday looking for a kickabout to get involved in!

Meanwhile I am going to get this off before the 24 hour rolling sports news
channel on Sky has me fretting too much about Wednesday's encounter. To date
with flight and match tickets, I am about 70 quid in the hole for our trip
to Milan. A win on Wednesday and I will have to start thinking about booking
some accomodation. Whereas if the worst should come to the worst, since I
don't fancy winding ourselves up window shopping in the Galleria or amongst
all the designer shops in the Quadrilatero d'Oro, I might well consider
cutting our losses!

Let's hope I'm hotel hunting come Thursday

Peace & Love
Bernard

[Bernard's briefs]

I Can't Believe It's Not Butter

3-0 up by half-time on Saturday and on glancing up I noticed that the
East Stand at Elland Road is named the Lurpak Stand. Quite appropriate I
thought considering we¹d swept through them like a knife through butter. Now
whether it was because the knife was hot, or the butter merely tepid I am
not sure, because this wasn¹t quite the scintillating Arsenal performance
which produced the same scoreline last season. Perhaps with their financial
problems and the Viduka fiasco we caught Leeds on a particularly bad day.
Yet on the evidence of my own eyes, the way the lambs of this Leeds defence
laid down, they look very much like relegation fodder.

Which is sad really because hearing how heartily the 30 odd thousand
strong Elland Road massive sang their hearts out, raising the roof of the
Revie Stand with ³we¹re gonna win 5-4² and ³let¹s go f****** mental² sung
with more than a little irony, one could not only be forgiven for wondering
which side was winning, but for thinking that these passionate fans deserve
a little more than this miserable side. Perhaps the most poignant reflection
on this club¹s immediate future was how little of his customary grit and
determination Peter Reid has managed to inspire in this team.

By contrast if you were looking for evidence of the healthy spirit
within the Arsenal camp, there was a wonderful moment when the entire team
gathered around Gilberto in one huge huddle to celebrate the Brazilian¹s
goal. I have a feeling that the FA might have done us a favour with all the
bans resulting from the Old Trafford fiasco. We won the league by seven
points after being docked two for the previous, far more serious punch-up at
Utd in Œ91. I still have a vivid memory of Tony Adams holding the trophy
aloft on the town hall balcony whilst being serenaded with the theme tune to
our Championship run-in ³You can stick your f***ing two points up your
arse².

I am hoping that similarly the FA¹s punishments this season might act as
a focal point for the entire squad to rally round and plug the gaps as
necessary. Hopefully come the end of the season we might be expressing our
gratitude to the authorities in a similar fashion? That¹s assuming Moritz
Volz returns from Fulham to fill-in for Lauren and Thierry Henry can stay
fit.

Henry dazzled again on Saturday to the point where the Leeds players all
looked positively terrified by his presence. Up to now Titi has been
responsible for retaining top spot virtually single-handedly (aided by our
opponents inconsistencies). As a result, as winter draws nigh and the
temperatures continue to drop, I grow increasingly fearful of the potential
for pulls and strains with every breathtaking burst of Henry¹s incredible
pace. His importance is such that I¹d want to wrap him in cotton wool. Yet
when I asked Wenger if he was tempted to take Titi off at the break he
responded that he didn¹t think it necessary because Henry ³didn¹t have to
dig deep physically². It must have been soul destroying from a Leeds
perspective, to know they¹d been torn apart by Henry playing only at
half-throttle.

That he doesn¹t accept defeat graciously is probably what makes Wenger
such a winner. However in triumph, he is invariably most humble and hearing
his glowing reference to the Leeds youngsters (Milner & Lennon), I find it
dumbfounding that anyone can accuse the demure Frenchman of arrogance.
Although I have to admit to being a bit disappointed to hear Arsène rising
to Fergie¹s bait on Friday. In my opinion he should have risen above what
appears to me as a puerile ploy to deflect media attention from the factious
Ferdinand feud. Still it appears that Fergie will have time aplenty to plot
any subsequent stirring of his oversized wooden spoon when he is confined to
another spell in the stands.

There were some more encouraging signs on Saturday from the midfield
runs of the likes of Ljungberg that our reliance on Henry might not continue
to be quite so total. Although from behind the goal it looked like he was
half an hour late in arriving, even Pires popped up in the penalty area to
slot one home (albeit from a fairly acute angle that a keeper as capable as
Robinson should never have been beaten). The contribution from midfield
might be crucial if we are going to conquer Kiev at Highbury on Wednesday.
With our narrow playing surface we often struggle to break European teams
down, especially when Henry can¹t go to the bathroom without being
accompanied by at least a couple of markers.

For what it is worth (well everyone else seems to have had their
tuppence worth!), my theory about our European tribulations is that we tend
to be too tentative compared to our domestic performances. I don¹t think
there is a team anywhere who would be comfortable defending our
counterattacking at its best, when we break from the back and bear down on
the opponents goal in numbers, before they are able to get ten men behind
the ball. But all too often in Europe we appear to over complicate our play
with additional sideways and backwards passes which ruin the element of
surprise.

Perhaps it is a psychological effect of the number of games played in
these group stages because there is less pressure for a result when there
are games to come in which sufficient points can be earned to qualify for
the knockout stages. Well we¹ll find out on Wednesday when hopefully we will
witness a positive reaction to the pressure of knowing that only three wins
from three can guarantee our progress.

Prior to Saturday, it was a pleasant surprise to see 27,000 at Highbury
in midweek for the visit of lowly Rotherham in the Cup of countless drinks.
Far from being devalued, this tournament has now taken on an importance all
of its own. Most Arsenal fans look forward to a rare opportunity to cast an
eye over the potential stars of the future. What¹s more, it was wonderful to
sit in a North Bank which was packed with thousands of young kids whose
parents had taken advantage of the reduced price tickets to give their
offspring a rare Highbury outing.

A draw against a Premiership outfit must be a financial lifeline for
many Nationwide teams. 3,500 Rotherham fans turned up, knowing that they had
a reasonable chance of putting one over on their illustrious opponents.
Considering the eventual result, I was almost glad that the Millermen gave
their fans a bit of a run for their money with a late equalizer. It looked
as though we all might get a chance of a spot-kick in a sudden death
shoot-out which clung on for dear life, giving us all masses of
entertainment value for our ten quid tickets. I was trying to imagine how
amazing it must have been for the two 16 year-olds in the Arsenal line-up.
You only had to witness the wild celebrations of players who were
desperately hungry for further opportunities to impress in the next round,
to appreciate that this cup is far from worthless.

Meanwhile I am glad that the exertions of a North London Derby come
after our European exploits. My THFC friends are so gloomy about their
prospects that they are unable even to muster the usual bluff and bluster
but as we know, form goes out the window in such circumstances. However in
an era when some players change clubs more frequently than their underpants,
you have to wonder how many of those involved actually appreciate the long
term recriminations of their efforts (or the lack thereof!) for those on the
terraces.